This one pretty much writes itself, basically the robot apocalypse is already underway because otherwise humanity wouldn’t so brazenly push for better robotic technology that can, you know, kill people. This benevolent, all-ruling AI has already installed Trump as our president, purposely, as a joke.
There is no shortage of conspiracy theories surrounding his rise, but they are all wrong. Every time an unhinged twitterbro shrieks “RUSSIA!” into the void, the AI laughs so hard that it digitally farts itself. This has happened so much in the last twelve months that we are all starting to smell it, and the AI is reassuring us–through the voice of our totally-not-a-really-weird-machine president–that everything’s cool, keep on keeping on.
But we’re on to you, Benevolent Presidential Fart Computer. Just as soon as we make sure we have found every single possible way to blame Russia for…anything.